Monday, July 18, 2011

Come on Out Peter! I Know You're There Somewhere!

I often find myself looking around with this big grin plastered across my face, assured that surely at any moment Peter Funt is going to jump out, come running up to me with his microphone, and announce that I am, in fact, on Candid Camera.

There are moments when my life just does not seem like reality, and the things that are happening can't surely be happening, and the things that my children are doing they surely aren't actually doing, and the fact that I'm their mother and responsible for raising these three and being an example for them to follow must truly be some type of practical joke!

But it is true that Peter and I have never yet met face to face. I have yet to sit down with my family on the couch and tune in to that episode where we laugh and laugh about the joke that was played on me.

Instead I laugh at the moments in this life that leave me shaking my head, completely amused, overwhelmed, blessed, and sweaty.

Take for instance, a quick little trip to the store this morning. I had all the kids loaded up in one of those mega carts. Boys strapped in the back, Adelyn in the carrier up front, and off we went. The shopping itself went fine, but then the boys wanted to help me through the self check out line. "Eh, what could it hurt?" I thought to myself. And so I let them out. All of the sudden there were four little arms everywhere, into everything. Everything I tell ya. Scanning everything they could get their hands on. Ethan even tried to scan his shoe. I then found Grayson taking things out of bags that I had already scanned and scanning them again. At the same time Ethan was standing up on top of his seat trying to grab some gum and candy bars and scan those. It was chaos. Complete and total pandemonium. Peter, come on out anytime now.


1. wild uproar or unrestrained disorder; tumult or chaos.

2. a place or scene of riotous uproar or utter chaos. (a.k.a. My Life)

The plan quickly changed. The boys were strapped back in with the promise of food being opened in the car as soon as we got ourselves there. I had to reassess everything and figure out what was and was not yet purchased. As the little man at the door said goodbye to us as we left, I was grimacing, certain that we were going to set off the detectors with some merchandise that had snuck by in our cart. But I was able to breathe a sigh of relief as we quietly passed through those doors and out to the car.

The second example comes from this afternoon during nap time. I use that term very loosely as it relates to this story. The boys fought their naps to save their lives today. They just did not want to lay down and go to sleep. After dealing with them for over an hour they were finally laying still, eyes closing, under the blankets, and I was assured that they were certainly drifting off for a couple hour rest. Adelyn was also sound asleep, and I figured it would be a good time to head out and quickly mow the lawn so Chris wouldn't have to deal with it this evening. I got the lawn mowed, and upon returning the house I saw that the receiver to Adelyn's monitowas no longer working. I thought it was a bit strange, but didn't think much of it. Sometimes the base in her room just needs to be reset. I then thought I had perhaps heard a muffled voice. I went to the bottom of the stairs and listened. Sure enough, I heard some giggles. As I approached the top of the stairs I could hear Ethan's voice saying "Adie! Adie!" It then occured to me that the voice from my son was coming out of my daughter's bedroom. I opened her door and saw Adelyn sitting there in her crib with this stunned look on her face, obviously woken. Her blinds had been opened up, her monitor had been unplugged, clothes strewn across the floor from her dresser, Grayson was underneath her crib and Ethan was standing on the rails popping her pacifier in and out of her mouth. It was totally a Peter moment.

I did quick damage control, ushered the boys out of the room, and calmed Adie down to see if she wanted to go back to sleep. (She did). The boys at this point were wired. Completely revved up and in no mood to take a nap. I instead had them sit on the couch where I told them that I needed to talk to them. I asked them, "Did you get out of your beds during nap time and go in to Adelyn's room?" They both said, "Yeths." Grayson then added, "I climbed o-o-o-over (*he has the cutest little stutter right now!) gate" (We have a gate up in their door for nap time, it obviously does a lot of good.) Ethan then said, "That was so much fun! Do it again morrow!" How do you keep a straight face and reprimand them when your precious little two year boys have this look of absolute glee on their face recounting their exciting adventure in their sister's bedroom. Ei yi yi. I kept my stern voice, but had to turn my entire face away from them for a few moments while I regained my composure.



  1. love it love it love it Beth--what a story

    Love BaPa

  2. Love this. I am exhausted for you!

    The whole scanning incident at the store makes me hyperventilate a little. And I feel like I know just how you feel.....right down to mowing during naptime so the husband doesn't have to worry about later.....

    And Adelyn went back to sleep! Yay!

    Oh what busy little boys!

  3. Oh, also....I've been trying to add your button to my blog....but it says the photo is no longer available....?

  4. what a day in the life of a Beth!!! Laughing out loud Beth!!! Thanks for sharing!!

  5. Dear Beth:

    What great stories! My reply to you -- using the title of the song by Lonestar -- is, "I'm already there."

    Maybe next time I will pop out. But, with or without my help, keep smiling.

    Peter Funt

  6. Beth...I checked and it REALLY IS PETER FUNT who left the comment on your blog!!!! Awesome!!! Your entry made me laugh so hard I had tears in my eyes. I bet those little boys were like 2 little octopuses in an apple picking contest running those things over that scanner:) And there is little Adie making mental notes of everything going down!!!! Ah Motherhood:)

  7. Like I said on email...Peter missed a good show!! He should have been in the store and/or in Adie's room!!!

  8. Melissa Ritter25.7.11

    lol that is just too funny Beth! you are an amazing mom, and those 3 kids are very lucky to have you as their mother. Isnt it crazy what weird things can happen when going anywhere w/ little ones. But it is hard to keep a straight face when they are so into what they are saying. My weakness has been the "yeth mommy" my little one still cant say it right, but i love it :) I wouldnt have my life any other way. And how awesome is that to have Peter Funt actually comment on your blog. too cool!!! Take care!! ** Melissa Ritter


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