Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Day 17: I'm Thankful For... friendships.

When I think back over the years of my life and the people I have met - I have been so very blessed. I have had many friendships that have come and gone. Some that have lasted just for a season, and looking back now I realize what a gift they were to me during that time.

I think back to some of my very first friends (besides my brothers of course!). I truly had my first best friend in 1st grade. Her name was April. We became fast friends and loved spending time together. It was hard on both of us when I moved away after third grade. We kept in touch for a couple years after I moved, but eventually lost touch. We, in just the past few years, have reconnected over Facebook again!

My cousins Ann and Lia were also two of my very best friends growing up. They were, and still are, very very special people in my life. We were inseparable and I have so many incredible memories of our lives together. They both shared the role of maid-of-honor in our wedding.

And since that time of childhood I have made and kept some pretty awesome friendships from college, and now many dear people through my work, church, and just life!

There was a time in my life where I really struggled with wanting every single friendship of mine to be a deep and meaningful friendship. I wanted everyone to be my very best friend and put all that I had in to trying to make sure everyone was! Whew! It was exhausting....and completely impossible!

A couple of years ago I read the book "Captivating" and I remember the author talking about how friendships were like a target. The center of the target is very small - this is like your very dear and best friendships. She said that it is truly not even possible to have more than 1, 2, or at the most 3 extremely close friendships. From there the levels of friendships continue to go out. You have some friendships that are close, but perhaps just not on that extremely deep level. At the largest point on the target you have friendships that are more like acquaintances. You may be pretty comfortable with them. They may know about your family, your hobbies, your personality, you may laugh with them...but they may not really know you, or you them, at that deep level.

This was so freeing for me to read! I felt like a huge burden had been lifted off my shoulders when I could just rest and enjoy where my friendships were. I didn't have to try so hard to have 535 best friends! :) I have always said that the friendships that I love are those that don't require a lot of work. By that I mean those people that you don't talk to for a few days, weeks, or months at a time - but yet when you do reconnect it's like no time was ever lost. You don't feel this pressure of having to call daily or the friendship will waiver. That has been a blessing with so many in my life.

As a mother now I just don't have the time either to invest in friendships like I used to. I'm not able to go out for lunch, dinner, or a movie as frequently as I once was. However, I am thankful for those in my life that understand that and those that are in the same boat as me! I am also so thankful for those opportunities that do arise now when I do get to sneak out of the house and have that time for myself. It is so good for me!

The friendships I have are so refreshing to my soul. Friendships that help me to clear my head and keep me focused on the things that really matter.

I am so thankful for all of you in my life dear friends!

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